Zeesy Powers
December 17, 2004
Under the sea is a mystery place
Under the sea lives a strange other race
They don't understand what it means to be human
Swim there with me, you won't know what to do man.
Under the sea, swim there with me.
Under the sea, under the sea.
Under the sea, swim there with me.
Under the sea, under the sea.
A SAILOR falls to the ocean floor. A REVERSE MERMAID swims by and finds him!
REVERSE MERMAID: Oh, hello! You must have run away from the Siren.
SAILOR: Glub glub glub.
RM: You don't know her? The Siren has all kinds of sailor friends.
SAILOR: Glub glub glub.
RM: No, I don't go near the ships, they might mistake me for tuna. I could ask the Siren for you, she knows when all the ships are coming by, but I doubt she'd take you there herself.
The SIREN'S song fills the sea. The SAILOR runs off into the waters.
RM: Wait, don't go! Poor fella, he's gonna get lost running around a strange place like this.
EXIT THE REVERSE MERMAID.
ENTER THE SIREN, SINGING.
ENTER THE SAILOR.
SIREN: How unexpected! A gentleman caller. Where did you come from, young man?
SAILOR: Glub glub glub.
SIREN: And I suspect you'd like me to take you back there?
SAILOR: Glub glub glub.
SIREN: Oh, that fish doesn't know what she's talking about. I much prefer the sea to the surface. I rarely make an appearance up there at all. Are you sure you wouldn't like to stay here with me a while?
SAILOR: Glub glub glub.
SIREN: Come here, Sailor, I'll take you to stay with the others. I'm sure you'll ship will still be there whenever you wont to go back to it.
SHE KISSES HIM.
This way, now.
THE SAILOR FLOATS OFF AFTER HER.
THE SIREN rises frow the sea to sing at the surface. She is singing a song to lure sailors. The sound of water splashing can be heard, and her song increases in complexity.
The REVERSE MERMAID swims up.
SIREN: Oh, it's you.
RM: Siren, why do you sing at the surface?
SIREN: You know I sing for the sailors.
RM: I know, but you have so many already. What do you do with all of them?
SIREN: It's not so much about what I do with them, I enjoy collecting them more than anything else.
RM: Do you think I could have one?
SIREN: You want one of my sailors?
RM: Yes, please, the new one. He ran off this morning before I could help him find his ship.
SIREN: That's the thing about collections, you have to hold on to the things you're collecting, or else you aren't really collecting them, you're just giving them away.
RM: Yes, but as I understand the scenario, you didn't really obtain that sailor square. I found him first, you see.
SIREN: And then he came to me, so now he's mine. Now if you'll excuse me, I have some alphebetizing to do.
EXIT THE SIREN.
REVERSE MERMAID: Back to the deep dark sea for me.
THE REVERSE MERMAID SIGHS AND EXITS.
We sink to the ocean floor, where all the sailors in the siren's collection are kept. The SIREN and the SAILOR are there.
SIREN: Don't be sad, sailor, all your friends are down here to keep you company.
SAILOR: Glub glub glub.
SIREN: Oh, you talk like that ship is the the greatest place on earth. Keep talking like that if you like, you'll only be boring yourself to death. I am off to go a singing.
SHE KISSES HIM, HE INHALES.
You behave nicely while I'm gone.
SHE EXITS.
ENTER THE REVERSE MERMAID.
RM: Sailor, Sailor, are you there?
SAILOR: Glub glub glub.
RM: It's time to go back to your ship. I've taken her key, Sirens have no pockets in their tails.[she unlocks him] There we are, sailor, you won't be chained to this dank cave anymore. Now come give me a kiss. My fishy lips are cold, and my fins won't hold you tight, but my legs are long and warm.
SAILOR: Glub glub glub.
RM: You don't speak our language very well, Sailor, I can hardly understand you.
SAILOR: Glub glub glub.
REVERSE MERMAID: What's that now? You want the Siren back? She'll never take you to your ship, you should know that by now. Come with me and we can go looking for it together!
SAILOR: Glub glub glub.
REVERSE MERMAID: [distressed] Sailor, what are you trying to say?
SAILOR: Glub... glub.... glub. [he dies]
REVERSE MERMAID: Oh Sailor! You can be so cruel.
ENTER THE SIREN
SIREN: Foolish fish! Don't you know sailors can't survive under the sea?
That's why I have to keep them safely under lock and key.
REVERSE MERMAID: But he looked so sad locked up like that....
SIREN: Sadder still to drown like a rat.
It's air they breathe, not water, or else they will expire.
It takes my lovely kisses for these sailors to respire.
How would that boy ever survive outside my siren's lair?
REVERSE MERMAID: Life as a reverse mermaid just isn't ever fair.
Under the sea is a mystery place
The rest of the body doesn't match with the face
They have no tv's
They only eat seaweed
Don't know what they want
Think that they know what you need
Under the sea, swim there with me
Under the sea, under the sea.
Under the sea, it's too dark to see
Under the sea, under the sea.
The end.